You mess with Harpo Marx, you get the horns.

Saturday, May 28, 2005

Stupid Governmental Act #34,723

Sex offenders in some American prisons are recieving Viagra via Medicaid. The programme was apparently started by some mid-level appointee's letter, sent out to states during the Clinton Administration, and has continued to the present day.

Given the sheer, unadulterated stupidity of this policy, I fully expect to see the following new government "services" get handed down from some enterprising bureaucrat's desk soon:

  • Gun permits for armed robbers in jail. Hey, prison's a rough place and these guys need to defend themselves from the prisoners with shivs.
  • Appointing convicted poisoners to the prison cafeteria. They've got to have a chance to reform, right? That would be a pretty good test, and if they fail, well, they're in prison already, so problem solved!
  • Using prisoners convicted of fraud to make credit cards for companies. We won't let them have any pen and paper while their working. They couldn't possibly memorize all those names and numbers, could they?
  • Ken Lay gets to do bookkeeping at his penitentiary. He's good at it isn't he? Just don't let him handle the guards' 401K plans.
  • High speed chase criminals in the auto shop. These people like cars. Is it so wrong to take advantage of their passion for speed to build better prison buses? We'll lock the garage doors, we promise!

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