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Sunday, September 25, 2005

Jailhouse Blues

So, Jorge Carlito is in prison now, no doubt after attempting to put either Danny DeVito or Warwick Davis in a trophy case at his palatial estate in the Hamptons. (Danny DeVito or Warwick Davis's palatial estate. Jorge Carlito lives in a "double-wide" trailer outside of Hampton, Virginia.) This explains his lengthy absence. I figured it was prison or he'd got a role in the Swiss version of Big Brother.

This presents a problem, as we are not about to bake Jorge Carlito a cake with a file in it to help him escape. The main reason for this is that neither Stew or I can bake at all, although Stew can make a mean plate of crepes. So, apart from any appeals or unlikely sudden revelations of mistaken identity ("It was Ben Affleck who was the culprit after all!") he's going to be incarcerated for a short while. Parole will be interesting as well, as Jorge Carlito make his way to the "house that is halfway".

We'll try to keep you posted on JCV's experiences in la casa grande. In the meantime, I expect he'll check in now and again. He's bound to get some good-behaviour privileges, due to his natural charm and amazing forging ability.

Word on the street is (or the blog-street, or whatever it's called) there is a remake of Elvis Presley's Jailhouse Rock planned, with JCV in the lead role. Expect loud rock music, dazzling sets, and numerous hip-injuries.


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