You mess with Harpo Marx, you get the horns.

Friday, October 21, 2005

Giant "Corpse Flower" is a Hoax!

A specimen of what was supposed to be the world's largest and smelliest flower, turned out to be a rank hoax.

This week, the Stuttgart Botannical Garden in Germany was exhibiting it's prized Titan Arum or "Amorphophallus Titanium" (Or "Changing Metal Thingy" in English). The popular nickname for the T and A, is "the Corpse Flower" because, as Haley Joel Osment might say, it smells like dead people.

Needless to say that, upon closer inspection, the botanists in Stuttgart were quite surprised to find out that their flower was in fact a Titan Aromum, or "Fake Giant Stinky Flower that Doesn't Actually Smell Half Bad, Kind of like Cabbage." After an detailed study of the plant, they learnt that the overpowering smell of rotting flesh coming from the flower was due to the prescence inside the plant of one Jimmy Hoffa, the missing American labour leader.

"We were very disappointed to find out it wasn't a Corpse Flower, but we did solve one of the biggest mysteries of the 20th Century!" said botanist Gurnst Ribbenflocken Von Spackle.

Visiting tourists demanded their money back when they learnt that the aroma they had been whiffing was not a world famous smelly plant, but in fact, the remains of a world famous labour leader. The Botannical Gardens were unable to provide monetary refunds, but did offer disppointed Arum-seekers free admission to their next special exhibition: Hoffa, The Man, The Fertilizer.

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