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Monday, November 21, 2005

Coming soon to the Connecticut Legislature...

Recent research indicates that one in five male drivers in Britain said that they were distracted whilst driving by roadside billboards of scantily clad female models.

Only one in ten women were distracted by billboards featuring scantily-clad male models. However, there were no statistics mentioned in the column regarding gay drivers, so people shouldn't leap to the conclusion that one is safer than the other.

(As a heterosexual male, that's my hope at least. Most blokes I know though, including myself, will keep their eyes dead set on the pavement if a giant billboard of a shirtless David Beckham turns up around a curve...but I digress.)

According to the researchers, among other things distracting to the eye on the roads were "flashing warning signs, huge advertising hoardings, and Christmas decorations." (Quote from the Reuters article)

Therefore the next big motorway pileup in Britain will be when drivers come across a sixty-foot billboard of Elizabeth Hurley in a red and white thong bikini, wearing a Father Christmas beard and holding mistletoe...and the five flashing warning sings leading up to it won't make a bit of difference.

Meanwhile, one can only guess that legislators in Connecticut are finding something new to add to their distracted driver law. Soon, one expects that Connecticut drivers will be required to tape their hands to the steering wheel and wear goggles that turn opaque when struck with any light that matches the colour of human skin. It's either that or elective surgery to qualify for a driver's licence, and I don't even want to begin to explore the possibilities there.

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