You mess with Harpo Marx, you get the horns.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Earl's Malady, Part II

No, I'm not writing a second novel. Rather, I'm just chiming in to day that posting will be limited as my injury woes continue.

I went back to visit with the doctor yesterday, or I should say to clinic, given that we currently use one of those walk-in, revolving doctor medical offices. The advantage is no appointments are necessary. The disadvantage is that one day you'll get Dr. Kildare, the next Dr. Jekyll. I'm hoping Dr. Crippen doesn't turn up.

All right, it's not that bad, and in fact we've been rather pleased with the service. However, to give you an example of the ever-changing nature of it, the original doctor diagnosed me with muscle spasms in my back. Yesterday's contestant raised the ante and suggested a ruptured disc in my neck. When I asked him what the treatment was for that, his answer baffled me. He rephrased the answer with one word: "steel." For those of you who don't get it yet, the answer is, paraphrasing Michael Palin in the barbershop sketch, "Cutting, cutting, cutting!"

So, surgery is an option. The physician pointed out that if it is a burst disc, the surgery would be very effective, and I'd wake up pain-free. "What about the actual surgery pain?" I naively asked. "Oh, that's not too bad, " he blithely answered.

In the meantime, I've plenty of physical therapy to look forward too. That should be hilarious for everyone except me. I'll tell you all about it.

I'm also getting lots and lots of Codeine. Did I tell you I was getting lots and lots of Codeine. (Looks up at the ceiling and smiles vapidly)

If not for the constipation, I could see how someone might get hooked on the stuff.

In the meantime, please take the time to e-mail Stew and Nuffy and suggest that if Earl can post whilst in excruciating pain (feel free to exaggerate on that point) then they can pop in for a post or two each week. Tell them there could be some codeine in it for both of them...

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