You mess with Harpo Marx, you get the horns.

Friday, January 28, 2005

Well it ain't poetry.

Just got an e-mail from our old pal Lukas P. Short, he's been reading the blog and is in the process of starting his own. He says he's going to call it Lukas P. Short's Crackerjack Almanac since that name was his original idea. He read Max and JCV's poetry and thought it was in his words "like fine branchwater poured over bourbon". He said he doesn't fancy himself a connoisseur of poetry but did send along some of the backwoods notions he is famous for.

You can tell a lot by a fella’s handshake, you can tell even more IF his hand shakes.


Silage in winter, hay in summer, Jim Beam in betwixt.

Mud is the glue that binds the heart of the man to the heart of the land.

Don’t ever judge a book by its cover, cause sometimes kids write on ‘em.

There are always two sides to a every story, make sure yours sounds the best.

The land is like a lady, it’s got some nice curves here and there, but can erode with time.

A young gal is like a fine wine, and she’ll knock you on your butt just as fast.

A fine whisky is best enjoyed in moderation, the rot gut can be guzzled freely however.

Do not let sleeping dogs lie, get’em up and keep’em honest.

Do not cry over spilt milk, save your bellyachin’ for spilt whisky.

Bourbon before noon is not a sin.

A young filly is best treated with respect and dignity, and don’t forget to worm her.

A man who calls them like he sees them. I for one will be awaiting the Crackerjack Almanac with much anticipation.

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