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Tuesday, March 01, 2005

What's the Frequency Kenneth? You never did say...

Dan "**** the Tennis Matches, It's Go Time" Rather will be officially put out to pasture this week. The pasture in question is 60 Minutes 2, where he and Andy Rooney will compete in a battle to the death to see who can be the most annoying television personality after Joel Siegel.

This blog aims to be as non-partisan as possible so I won't spend time delving into the political aspects of Mr. Rather's career, not even the slap-boxing hissy-fit he and George Herbert Walker Bush got into. (Except to say that Barbara Bush could probably beat both of them senseless in a real fight.)

No, we who aspire to the noble art of loonery appreciate that Danny Boy was a constant source of sterling material. From his sidewalk mugging by a man vaguely resembling Michael Stipe, ("What is the frequency Kenneth?") to his nightly valediction to the nation of "Courage!" which was made into an insipid Cartoon Network series about a dog, Dan always left us with a reason to think that he was two cans short of a six-pack of Guinness. That wasn't half bad because he was truly three bottles short of a six-pack. Being a newsman, we just spotted him the other bottle.

By the way, the frequency was 94.9 FM. He should have known that, but without a teleprompter the man is useless with details.


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