It's Oscars time. Somebody wake the Grouch.

Friday, April 22, 2005

Happy Earth Day!!

We can't let Earth Day come and go without some mention. I hope everyone out there who loves clean air and water will get involved and do something. I won't breathe or drink anyting else. Oh, I am also going over to Lukas P. Short's big Earth Day shindig that he throws at his ranch in Texas. He is a self-described "man of the earth" and is always busy this time of year. I got a sneak peek at his "to do" list for this year's party.

To do before big Earth Day party

  • Cut down that pesky old oak out front so I can see more earth on Earth Day. It’ll make good sawdust for oil spills in the shop and mulch for the flowerbeds.

    Drive SUV into town to pick up some cheap tuna at Wal-Mart for appetizers. Get the Flipper brand stuff. I do love the great taste of porpoise.

    Fire up my big old diesel generator to run the 10,000 light “I Love Earth Day” sign I made.

    Slaughter a few head of cattle to barbecue and make leather placemats for the party. Call Billy Ray to make the “I (heart) Earth Day” designs on them.

    Clear-cut a couple of acres for the “tree plantin’” . I think an oak would look nice in there.

    Buy 20 gallons of kerosene for the lamps so we can feast our eyes on the Earth when the sun goes down.

He means well, he really does.

*************

p.s. Zim, I loved Wanda in Pootie Tang. But what was there NOT to like?

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