It's Oscars time. Somebody wake the Grouch.

Thursday, April 21, 2005

Seacrest? Walk of Fame?

The Walk of Fame is that well-known Hollywood institution where stars bearing the names of well-known entertainment personalities are placed on prominent sidewalks. No visit to Hollywood is complete without hearing someone say, "Myrtle, I just stepped on Kevin Costner!" or some other well-known personality.

I myself have gently trod upon Groucho Marx, Charles Chaplin, and Buster Keaton, who are three of my favourites. (I have however vowed to repeatedly stamp on John Tesh and Paul Anka's stars should I ever come across them. By all accounts they're two very nice gentlemen, but between Entertainment Tonight and You're Having My Baby, they have stolen precious minutes of my life that could otherwise have been spent sleeping or playing Virtual Trapped in a Well. Honoring them with a Walk of Fame star is, to me, in the same category as giving the Nobel Peace Prize to Yasser Arafat or Henry Kissenger...highly inappropriate.)

Apparently Hollywood is getting desperate for new Walk of Fame honorees. The latest "celebrity" to be so honoured is the host of American Idol, Ryan Seacrest. Now, don't get me wrong, but what, aside from hosting a glorified talent show for the magic demographic age set, has Mr. Seacrest done to qualify him for a star? I realize he is also a radio guy, and perhaps he's more well known in that department, but really, hosting a talent show? Walk of Fame? Is he the finest talent show host the entertainment industry has ever seen? Has he raised the relatively low and unthreatening standards Ed McMahon set during his run of Star Search? Does he do the show multilingually? Whilst dancing? And yet, apparently, Robert Redford, Mel Gibson, Jane Fonda, and Clint Eastwood do not yet have stars.

In all fairness to Seacrest, he dealt with the honour in an endearingly humble, and for my sixpence, honest way. He's quoted in the article as saying, "I actually thought it was a joke when I heard that they were going to do this." and "One person is going to come today.' ... I thought this would be the most unpopular star dedication ever." Clearly he knows where things stand.

He seems a very nice bloke at that... but I'm still going to stamp on his star if I come across it. Nothing personal. The 15 minutes I lost watching American Idol were very important to me.

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