Marshall, Will, and Holly on a routine expedition...

With word that Will Ferrell will star in an upcoming remake of the 70's Saturday morning hit Land of the Lost my mind harkens back to another story concerning Cha-Ka of the aforementioned program. The story relates how Rodney Sheppard of the band Sugar Ray had to 'fess up to not having been the hairy urchin (a.k.a. monkey boy) as he had listed in his biography on the band's website. Seems Phil Paley, who had donned the monkey suit and unappealing makeup, found it too much that he was not given credit, a dubious honor certainly. One has to wonder who was the more embarrassed by the whole incident. Be that as it may, we at DOUI have just completed exhaustive research to right the wrongs of misplaced '70s glory.

We must hereby let it be known that:

• Tori Amos was not H.R. Pufnstuf
  
  Steven Tyler was not Adam from Ark II
  
  Puffyamiyumi were not Elektra Woman and Dyna-Girl
  
  Donnie Osmond was not Jimmy from H.R. Pufnstuf
  
  In a reversal Commander Stone from Jason of Star Command was not in the Blue Man Group.
  
  Marilyn Manson was not Dracula from Monster Squad
  
  Underdog was not Hong Kong Phooey
  
  (Insert name of 70’s Pop pretty boy) was not Billy Batson in Shazam
  
  Prince was not Sigmund (OK, HE may HAVE been)
  
  Michael Jackson was not Loki (please refrain from making any other joke there)
  
  Pink was not the Pink Panther
  
  Larry Mullen Jr. was not Jabberjaw
  
  Speed Buggy was not Wonderbug

And last but not least, Ozzy Osbourne was not Captain Caveman.