Chico y Jose reports in

I received this message from soon-to-be DOUI contributor Chico y Jose (he of the galactic bacon menace):

Well Earl I've been kinda busy with my heifers. I'll report in when the trail ride is over. Chico y Jose.

I had no idea he was a cattle man. Stew, did you know? I wonder if he can get us some steak at cut-rate prices? Does he ranch Holsteins? Longhorns? Angus? Kobe? I wonder what the Chico y Jose brand looks like?

All this is probably pointless to a reader who has not personally met the man. The mental image of him in cowboy hat and on horseback is a peculiar one indeed (the only stranger one would be imagining Max Speebek as a rancher).

Anyway, he's not forgotten us, which while small consolation to readers, is of immense satisfaction to those in the government whose job it is to monitor the intentions of potentially hostile extraterrestial bacon. Maybe the ranching gig is a subtle counterplot?

I just realized that this is probably the most obscure post I've made on this site yet...