You mess with Harpo Marx, you get the horns.

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Who Said it?

A popular game in some quarters is matching up interesting and outrageous quotes with the people who originated them. See if you can match up the following (reputed*) quotes with the person who (reputedly*) said them. Answers below:

1. "I told that ***** that no one messes with Martha, and if she didn't watch it I would slam her head through the bars of her cell and put a nice doily on her head."

2. "I am a massive fan of Milli Vanilli and always have been."

3. "Nudity is highly overrated."

4. "What you talkin' bout Willis?"

5. "I accept your nomination as President of the United States!"

6. "Marsha, Marsha, Marsha!"

7. "If I were a sandwich, what kind of sandwich would I be?"

Answers:

1. Lindsey Lohan's dad, during the two weeks he was mistakenly incarcerated in the women's prison that held Martha Stewart.
2. Pope Pius XIII
3. Madeline Albright upon her first meeting with Kim Il-Sung
4. Genghis Khan during a bar-mitzvah in Hoboken
5. Howard Dean, in a mirror, the night before the Iowa Caucus.
6. Alarmingly enough, Peter Brady.
7. David Dimbleby on BBC Question Time, during a discussion of Scottish Labour laws.

* "Reputed" in this case means "made up".
* "Reputedly" in this case means "don't sue us, it's a joke you humorless gits!"

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