It's Oscars time. Somebody wake the Grouch.

Thursday, November 03, 2005

Ummmm...OK, I suppose that's news...

Kevin Federline has at long last produced his debut rap album, a clip of which has surfaced on the Internet.

Kevin Federline? Kevin Federline... Hmmmm. Nope, sorry. No idea. I'll have a guess.

Is he the bloke who invented Cheez Whiz?

No, no, wait...the starting strong safety for the Detroit Lions, right?

Fullback for West Bromwich Albion?
The night chef at the local Sonic?
Ambassador to EuroDisney?
First man to pluck a chicken in space?
Tallest man in Aran?
World's Slinky champion?
Winner of the Tour D'Monaco?
Flight Attendant on Pinchpenny Airlines?
Village People replacement singer?
One of Madonna's many dancers of indeterminate sexuality?
Skink Wrangler?
Stilt Walker for Joe and Fred's Two Ring Circus and Carny Geek Show?
That bloke who hides under the overpass and lives on Jim Beam and rainwater?
Inventor of the Aussie Rules Football goal signal?

I give up (reads article).

Ah...Brittney Spears husband. Why didn't they simply call him by his common name: Mr. Brittney Spears?

As for his album, here's a sample lyric:

"Back then, they called me K-Fed, but you can call me Daddy instead"

If I were him, I'd see if the bloke under the overpass needs a protege.

One of the "songs" on his album is called "Y'all Aint Ready."

Kevin... we'll never be ready.

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