Post Number 1,000!!!

Well, now you know the reason for that crappy post I just put up. It's our 1,000th post here at DOUI!!!

We'd like to thank our spouses, our kids, our families, our agents, our crack legal team (and by that, I mean they're on crack), Tom Cruise for being such a mental case, Martha Stewart for her unrelenting optimistic cynicism, Don Trump for moussing his hair with Crisco, Ben Affleck and Jennifer Lopez for having the chemistry of chicken broth, the Congress of the United States and the British Parliament for being the disfunctional, partisan goof offs they are, and Cameron Diaz for her fabulous ability to draw masses of hits at the mere mention of her name in the blog.

That's Cameron Diaz, with a C:

C-a-m-e-r-o-n D-i-a-z. Cameron, like the Spanish word for "shrimp" and Diaz which is Spanish for "tamale."

We'd also like to thank all of our readers for giving us the inspiration to continue this blog, despite the fact that there are so few of you and so many of us in comparison. God bless all of you, and if you're a new reader browsing in, please stick around as there's more to come.

I don't mean stick around literally. Just come back here every day or two.

Party's at Cameron's place!