Oprah frys Frey over fictitious flight of fancy.

Oprah has taken dishonest biographer James Frey to task this week over his book "A Million Little Pieces" saying that he "duped" her, her viewers, and the buyers of his untruthful tome. While I have to agree with Oprah that it was an underhanded thing to do I have to wonder where her crack staff was when they should have been vetting it. Certainly they could have done a little work to see if the guys story checked out. For instance if they had taken the time to research the book they would have learned that:

• Frey was not elected President of the United States in 1972.
• Frey was not a member of The Eagles and did not write "Smugglers Blues".
• Frey has never married to Morgan Fairchild.
• Frey was the team captain of his high school "Pathological Liars" Club. He continues as the club sponsor to this day.
• Frey once bit the head off of a bat in concert at the Hollywood Bowl.
• Frey turned states evidence on Juan Carlos Vega in 2005, landing our good friend in the pen for 5 to 10 years, with time off for good behavior.
• Frey is made entirely of tungsten and has kneecaps made of lead.
• Frey did not invent the internet. (That was Al Gore.)
• Frey has never made a bad joke about Tom Cruise jumping on couches. He leaves that to us.
• Frey does not exist in our time space continuum.

If Ms. Winfrey is reading the blog this week I would like to put in a plug for my next memoir "Stew Miller: Man of a Thousand Veils". Riveting, just riveting.