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Monday, February 27, 2006

A bit of confusion in Orlando

Stew, I can understand your concern that Robert "J├Ąger" Iger might be letting these Nazi bastards get out of hand in Orlando. However, I did some checking and found that, thankfully it was all a horrible mistake on the web site. Apparently today's online Disney listings contained several typos, since corrected.

  • The Epcot curfew is actually a parade: Dumbo II: A Grand Curfew, celebrating the upcoming straight-to-the-archives release of the long-awaited sequel to the film about a flying elephant who partied way too late into the evening. (Frankly, I blame the mouse in the Sgt. Pepper's uniform. He probably hooked Dumbo on Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds, if you know what I mean.) It is true that violators will be shot...out of a giant circus cannon! It looks like loads of fun.
  • It's a Small World was actually renamed It's a Fashion World and contains a variety of extravagant designs from all over the world, and the most bare skin you'll see outside of the Little Mermaid exhibition (Two Shells and a Tail). The fireworks display is actually entitled Blintzes over Glavne Gas and is ironically a tribute to Yiddish holiday cuisine, starring the Tsuglaykh (Equal) Dancers and the usual Disney gang, except for Miss Piggy from the Muppets, as she's not kosher.
  • The new Animal Kingdom attraction is It's Tough to Be a Director (although anyone who's been on a Disney set could make that mistake..ha, ha!) Tony Danza plays Alfred Hitchcock and Marilu Henner co-stars as Tippi Hendren. The fun animal sidekicks are Scotty, the sleuthing squirrel with a fear of heights, and Norman Bates, the knife happy chimp, who dresses as his mother and slits open anyone who gets too close to his bananas!
  • The Magic Kingdom will be starting Zepplin flights in April, but only as part of their Hindenburg Spectacular! (Note: Be sure to wear flame-retardant clothing if you ride this one.)
  • Finally, Disney Studios is actually running the attraction Drew Carey Presents: The Winfred-Louder's Department Store Fire, a recreation of the last episode of the Drew Carey Show, where the entire cast is burned to a crisp after Lewis and Oswald accidentally forget that grain alcohol and flatulence lighting don't mix (Don't worry! It's cleaned up for the kiddies. They keep their trousers on.)

That last one was a pretty big typo, but W is close to R on the keyboard!

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