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Saturday, January 22, 2005

Hollywood Unoriginality

There are many things one can say about Hollywood's refusal to embrace originality, wit, and artistic creativity. Fortunately, this is a PG blog, and so we'll pass over all 62 pages of those things and get to the meat of the crux of the heart of the matter, etc.

Hollywood is populated by shameless, lazy copycats. I left out greedy and corrupt, but I want to work there eventually and don't want to burn any bridges. Besides, who in Hollywood (or the known galaxy for that matter) is reading this now anyway?

There, I've said it and I feel better for having done so. They made "the Brady Bunch" into a movie. They made the "Beverly Hillbillies" into a movie. They're making "Bewitched" into a movie. They even made "M.A.S.H." into a movie! (Wait, scratch that last one...)

Anyway, why not try something original. Why not a movie about struggling Comedy Blog writers and their trivails as they attempt to entertain the desperate masses of people cruising Blogger for amateur art and poetry, political dirt, and semi-risque' travelogues. I can see it now. Thrill to the shocking exploits of a young man fighting with the ftp server as he tries to load a graphic of William Shatner with a fake handlebar mustache onto a blog! Swoon to the horror of e-mailers attempting to correctly spell the word "Zimpter"! Warm your hearts with the feel-good story of a bunch of blog writers as they win the 1969 World Series and simultaneously develop a cure for osmosis!

All right, these need a little work. But Bewitched? Really! No one can replace Elizabeth Montgomery. I admit Jim Carrey might do a passable imitation of Dick York, but who's going to play Endora? Helen Thomas?

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Update: It's Nicole Kidman and Will Ferrell. I like both of them, but why do I sense their presence will turn this into the nude version of Bewitched?

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