Pontifical Electoral Clarification

I just want to clear up any potential confusion. I, Earl Fando, am not running for Pope. If somehow elected, I will defer to Jon Cryer who is my preferred candidate. If Jon I refuses, then, and only then, will I assume complete and total authority over the Holy See, and only if I get to wear the hat all the time, even at matches.

("Hey Pope! Down in front, mate...we can't see the field for your bloomin' chapeau!")